_ 159 _ because the Father and the Captain had ordered that I was to lead them temporally and spiritually, and as they were all so different they often fought and then they would come and ask me to adjudicate, making various complaints against each other, and others had other problems. With so many different things I hardly knew what to do; sometimes I reconciled them, at other times I could do nothing with them and threatened them, and sometimes I had them arrested, both men and women, as Our Lord guided me. Love alternated with fear. I observed this order with them: first, in the morning I visited them, and found out their needs in order to supply them, and I gave food to the poor, of whom there were some hundred and fifty; in the evenings I taught them Christian doctrine, getting two men to gather them together. Meanwhile, news arrived that the Turks had reached Ormuz and laid siege to the fortress. The people in this fortress, who are Moors, began to treat us with contempt, and to scoff at us and tell us we had only four more days to live and then they would cut off our heads. They asked me why, if all was lost, did I go on teaching the Christians? I should not do so, because they would all come together and kill me. When I saw this, being very
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