_ 377 _ error. From then onwards they kept a strict watch on the way in that I could not enter, because I was such a great sorcerer, despite the fact that the King sought every mean to visit me. My sadness was quite considerable when I saw such a prize lost (which would have made me rich forever), and attributed all this to my great sins. It so happens that this evil is constant in me, namely, a temptation to sadness, from which a despair of virtue grows, through which I lose part of the fervour that I have. This originates in my great pride and presumption in believing that the work is more mine than God’s, who gently arranges everything. Pray for me. However, the Lord was careful to deal with me tactfully, giving many other consolations and increasing rather than diminishing the number of Christians each day, for me to forget past sadness. [122r] After he left Ormuz I have already left Ormuz the better to comply with holy obedience, which calls me to Japan and to China(A), and Fr. Gonçalvo Rodrigues remains in my place. The Lord is allowing me to fulfill my ever-burning desire for that (A) See the writing of Xavier in EX II 214-15.
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